Cape Hatteras is worth the climb! (PQW 6/1/11)

Recently, my mother-in-law came to visit from California. It wasn’t her first visit, but anytime she heads east, we try to do something she’s never done before in North Carolina. This year, we took her to Cape Hatteras and Ocracoke. She’s a big fan of light houses and got to see three of them, including Bodie. 

Cape Hatteras Lighthouse is open to climb now seasonally and we went on the first day it opened. Turns out, my son is too small to climb it and you are not allowed to carry a child up like I had originally planned to do, so we adults took turns climbing the lighthouse and playing with the little guy.

I’m in my early thirties and have considered myself to be relatively fit and in good working order for the most part. That was flawed thinking. But I didn’t discover the error until I was about 200 steps into the total 257 steps and fervently praying to God to let me live to see the view. My leg muscles were on fire! I reminded myself to thank whoever made the rule that I could not carry a 33 pound three year old up on my hip. Sheer genius. I kept reminding myself that Craig had just climbed it in record time with one working leg and a cane. If he could do it, surely I could manage. Of course, he didn’t jog up the first 100 steps either. By step number 240, I was completely convinced I would need to be lowered down in a rescue basket, but I was positive it would be easier for them to do that if I could just get to the top. Must get to the top!

Finally, I made it. I stepped out into gale-force winds and one of the most breath-taking views I have ever seen. I was actually a bit dizzy looking out from that height. (let’s be honest, it was the stairs.) I whipped out my camera and took a gazillion pictures. I didn’t want to miss a thing because I had already planned to never ever climb those steps again. I struck up a conversation with a guide in hopes of postponing my decent. I learned that on a clear day, you can see forever! Well, at least 20 miles out or so. That’s incredible!

After about 15 minutes, I decided that I missed my family and needed to go back down. I found that going down stairs is way easier! I got to the bottom and looked back up at the top and felt a new love for that lighthouse. What a true beauty it is! Can you imagine the leg muscles of the lighthouse keepers?

My mother-in-law had a fantastic time in Hatteras and here in NC in general. Already thinking up what we might do on her next visit. Craig and I have decided, that whatever it is, it probably will not have stairs.

Here's the Buzz! (PQW 5/4/11)

My son has recently entered the stage of being scared of bees. He doesn’t like other “bugs” either but I actually take offense to a dislike of bees. Bees, mainly honeybees, have been a part of my life in some way for longer than I can even remember. My dad was a part-time beekeeper for many years and came to speak to schools and extension offices. Before building the house in Hertford, we had honeybee hives right behind our home in Elizabeth City. My parents would find me sitting directly in front of the hive, mesmerized by the traffic in and out of the hive. Honeybees would land on me, but I didn’t mind and they didn’t bother me. Sure, I’ve been stung before. But it hurt the honeybee more than me. I’d like to give you all some nerdy honeybee facts to take with you to impress your friends.

First of all, honeybees sting. They could never bite you. Their mouths are far too small. Also, when they sting, the stinger is left in you along with the venom. You should always scrape it off instead of grabbing it. You don’t want to squeeze in more venom. When the stinger detaches from the honeybee, it pulls out part of the lower intestines and kills the bee. So it’s pretty much impossible to be stung by the same honeybee more than once.

Honeybees are the only way we get real honey. They make it by collecting nectar from flowering plants, digesting it and then regurgitating it into honeycomb as honey. Yum, right? Things you wish you didn’t know! You are welcome.

Honeybees tell other worker bees they have found nectar by doing a dance in front of the hive. It’s in a figure eight shape and tells the other workers the direction and how far away the flowers are. Also, all honeybees you see in your flowers are females.  The male bees, called drones, have only one purpose – making babies, and then they are kicked out of the hive! There’s usually only one queen per hive. She stays in the hive laying eggs. 

Those big bees you see flying around? Those are Carpenter (or Boring) Bees. They do not have stingers but do have terrible vision and will run into you. They are fairly harmless to you but will bore holes into your home or deck. You can hit them with a tennis racket, but it's way more effective to treat your house or deck with an environmentally safe "bee repellent."

Everyone should be extremely concerned with the well being of honeybees. Especially if you are like most people and like to eat. Hive Collapse is a serious problem and not getting much press! Honeybees are dying out and no one is completely sure why. Bees pollinate most of the plants we eat and without them we stand to lose many vegetables and fruits. Farmers are concerned and you should be too! Please be cautious of the pest control sprays you use outside and call a beekeeper for swarms. Be sure to buy 100% honey (local if you can). Some companies including Haagen Daaz and Burt’s Bees support Hive Collapse research. Be kind to honeybees because we really need them! Definitely friend and not foe. That’s the bee buzz!

The Importance of Being Inquisitive (PQW 4/6/11)

I am the current victim of an inquisition that would make the Spanish of olden days weep and beg for mercy. I am held hostage day in and day out and asked an endless barrage of questions that are sometimes pointless and often times I don’t even know the answers. I am the mother of a 3 year old.

Some of you may feel my pain. You may understand my sigh and prayer for patience as I navigate my day of to-dos and traffic while being bombarded with seemingly unanswerable inquiries concerning the future whereabouts of the truck that went by or the farmer missing from his tractor in a field. A simple “I don’t know” doesn’t seem to work, so I have to invent a purely fictitious account of how the day is spent for people I don’t know and will never meet.

Then there’s the other kinds of questions ranging from “why does it rain?”, “Why is the sky blue?” to “What makes it so airplanes can fly? and “Why is the sun up?”. By the seat of my pants, I have quickly explained the notions of the water cycle, how light works in the electromagnetic color field, aerodynamics and the rotation of the earth. Thank you very much, but it’s all in a day’s work.

Granted, I don’t have to. I could easily tell my son that God made it rain and leave it at that. But if he’s asking questions, that’s my time to teach. God does make it rain and the water cycle is how it happens. It’s important to be inquisitive. It definitely drives me crazy some days, but I just keep answering. I know that if it wasn’t for questions, I wouldn’t know very much at all. 

I have to be ready for the follow up questions after my explanations. After all, this little guy is carrying some big brains. For this reason among many others, I really believe you should have to take a class or get a separate degree just to have children. Just so you have the tools to answer all of these queries. 

I’m very thankful for technology in ways I have never been before. Even my phone has the power of Google right at my finger tips. Many think it’s for business types to use at work, but parents know the real story. It’s so we don’t look like complete idiots in front of our children. So now instead of saying “I stink at math and don’t exactly know how fast you’d have to run before you would take off with your Superman cape on.” I can Google it. All while telling him to stop practicing in the house! 

Sounds of Spring! (PQW 3/16/2011)

Ahh, the sounds of spring! Have you heard them? The birds are singing and I hear my wind chimes. I’ve even heard a few tractors rumbling into the field for the beginnings of the growing season. Spring is probably my favorite. Not allergy wise, definitely. I suffer greatly for my favorite season, just like many of you do. But after a long and cold winter though, it is really refreshing to hear the sounds of life starting up around me.

I have another favorite sound of spring though. Recently, while I doing some spring cleaning, my son and husband were in the garage and I heard the distinct sounds of the rumbling 289 engine in our “warm weather car”. My husband still has his first car, a 1967 Mustang Coupe, in our garage and it’s my favorite car in the world. It has belonged in his family for almost 30 years and Craig and his Dad worked together on it. He drove it throughout high school in the Southern California town that he grew up in. It still has the original California plate in the front. It was Ford’s springtime yellow back then.

In 2001, Craig’s dad had it painted silver blue with white racing stripes and shipped it across the country to NC where Craig was stationed in the Coast Guard. In April of 2002, the sweet sound of that car changed my life when I heard it pull into the parking lot of Muddy’s Coffee Shop in Elizabeth City. That distinct mustang sound got my attention for sure. It was so pretty and the owner so handsome that I just had to talk to him. That car is pretty special, you see. Craig still tells people he picked his wife up with a car.

The rest is history, as they say. But the sound of that engine still gets my attention. It doesn’t have heat or even a radio, so it’s usually just a warm weather treat. We ride and listen to the ponies run. It doesn’t have air conditioning, so I sport the “windblown” look whenever I ride in it. It doesn’t have a key fob with automatic locks. It doesn’t even have power breaks, so it literally takes all that is in me to stop that thing. I don’t drive it much for that reason.

But what it does have is a special place in my heart and in the heart of my family. My son absolutely adores “Daddy vroom car”. We were thrilled that his child seat fits in the back. In 1967, child safety seats weren’t exactly what they are now. It’s like a mini vacation when we pile into the car for an ice cream treat, a Sunday drive or especially a cup of coffee.

So now that spring is almost upon us and you are enjoying your favorite sounds of the season, listen for a distinct vroom. And be sure to wave when you see us go by!

Get Happy! (PQW Feb)

This time of the year is probably my least favorite. Dreary, cold, and everyone seems to be sick. Everything looks dead and everybody has a serious case of the blahs, am I right? 

In light of all of that depressing stuff, a friend of mine on Facebook recently got her friends to help compile a list of stuff that makes them happy. I thought it was interesting to see how simple most of those things were. Many seemed to be universal and some were very personal. Some people, especially Americans, seem to think that happiness is a goal in which we must strive to reach or are entitled to receive. We spend too much money and time in it’s pursuit.  In reality, it is found more in our state of mind than in our circumstance. It is found in the simple rather than the expensive.

For example, here is a list of some of the things that make me happy, in no particular order:

*Time spent laughing with and at my family. Super easy to do. I mean, have you met them?

*Date night. Before children, I had no idea it would be so important. It’s a rare and sacred bird for sure.

*Uninterrupted book time. I fall asleep many nights on a book.

*Having an idea for a newspaper column!

*Freshly turned dirt in the spring. You can tell I was raised in a farming community! The smell of dirt always does something to my brain. Dirt is in my blood. That sounds yucky, but if you have it, you understand what I mean! 

*Inside jokes with good friends. I am a lover of all things funny, but inside jokes are special. It’s like a code between you and someone else that sounds dumb once explained to others.

*Watching my son succeed at something. That almost surpasses happy. That’s a deep joy.

*Good hot coffee and sweet iced tea

*Open windows on a nice day

*Hammocks

*Helping others.

My “happy stuff” might be way different than yours or we might have lots in common. Making a list of things that brighten my life has brightened my mood and I just might make it till spring! If you are stuck in the winter doldrums, give it a try! Think simple. 

“Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.” -Nathaniel Hawthorne

How sweet it is...

Hope you all have a nice Valentine weekend! Not doing anything really special here. I don't really care for the commercialization of forced romance. Bah humbug. I know I sound like a jerk. Craig does sweet stuff all the time and I really don't need a Hallmark day and crowded restaurants.


I learned all I needed to know about Valentine's Day the first year we were married. Our very first Valentine's day was spent with me recovering from a foot operation that required them to re-break my foot and insert a pin. I was on crutches & in pain. Then Craig accidentally sat on my glasses and I was rendered blind as well. I could not stop laughing! It was about as far from romantic as you could get and I thought it was hilarious. The only individual with romance on the brain was my dog, who went into heat before we could have her altered. It was a fantastic day had by all. Craig, who has a great sense of humor, managed to salvage the day by making me dinner and dramatically presenting me with a pretty heart necklace. We ate a ton of chocolate and watched TV together.  It's the stuff that memories are made of.


This year is fun in a much different way. We are making valentine's for my son to take to preschool for all of his friends. That made me think. I don't need a special Hallmark day to show Craig how much I care, but it's a great day to remind me to tell my family & friends how much they mean to me. That will be my focus this year.


I love you all. God bless you all. Happy Valentine's Day!

Attention Deficit!

Ever notice how when you really need to concentrate on getting something done, the whole world seems to conspire against you? It’s kind of like you become the main target for distraction. 

I’ve had a day like that today. I’ve been working on a speech for church. It’s long and I really need to have my thoughts organized, which if you have met me, you know that’s a hefty feat to accomplish in of itself.

I sat down this morning while my little one was at preschool and attempted to write. I made some significant headway, but then doubt crept up. I decided I didn’t really like it and didn’t know how I’d finish it anyway in that direction, so I started over.

Well, I tried to. After early success, I ended up sitting with my laptop curser blinking at me for about 10 minutes, so I decided to check facebook. I was sucked into that for 20 minutes and then it was time to get my son.

After that, I’m doing lunch and getting him settled down for a nap. I decided to listen to some music to get my thoughts focused again, and I found a song I liked and danced around the living room, singing.

Ok, refocus again. Any ideas? No. But that song was sure fun, let’s sing it again. Time to check Facebook and throw out some silly tidbit from my brain. My brain has no shortage of sound bites, just nothing worthwhile for a speech.

Back to the speech again. I have an idea, but it peters out about 2 paragraphs in. Start over. I found a quote I want to use but I can’t seem to work it in, so I decide to look for other quotes. Before long I’m laughing at Bugs Bunny cartoons on YouTube. How the heck did that happen?

Refocus again. Maybe this time I have something worthwhile. Typing along pretty well when I need a bathroom break. To my horror, I discover that my 3 year old son was not asleep like I assumed, but in the bathroom playing in the litter box under the sink.

Ok...you know what? I still have time to work on the speech and it’s obviously not happening today. I cannot work in these conditions! So, I’m going to spend the rest of the day doing some fun stuff and maybe...just maybe there is a part of my brain still swirling out speech ideas and I’ll get hit with inspiration soon!