As you read these words, I want you to know I’m now different. I’m not the Ashlea Davis of yesteryear or a few days before. I am brand new. What could I possibly be so dramatic about, you wonder? Well, I’ll tell you, but to be honest, I might cry.
Hello. My name is Ashlea. I am the mother of a teenager.
My first born is now 13. He is a quaran-TEEN of 2020, because celebrating such a momentous occasion is a bit lame this year. Nevertheless, Carson is a teenager.
Being a teenager and all, I won’t make this about him specifically. He’d laugh and do a little eye roll, perhaps. Deserving, for sure. I’ve told him I don’t know how to be a mother of a teenager and I covet his thoughts and prayers during this time.
First borns are an interesting breed, aren’t they? I would know, I am one. They are an entire experiment and we’re all honestly lucky to be here. The lives of second borns and beyond are considerably easier in many respects and you are WELCOME for that privilege. I used to give my parents a bit of a hard time over how differently my sister, Amanda, was parented through the stages that I had passed 4 years prior. Mom would shrug and say she learned things the first time. Dad would shrug and say she’s the favorite. It’s a long standing “joke” in my family. I find it “very funny.”
Family dysfunction aside, Mom is right & Dad is not. I do things with my oldest that I realize are dumb, so I fix it with my youngest. I’m sorry. I’ve explained to Carson that it would be even dumber to continue the dumb thing a second time just to be even and he laughingly agreed. I’ve told him many times that when he hits new stages, it’s new for me, too. I may have seen his stage before, but not as the parent. I’m learning, reading, talking to other families, leaning in to who my children are, and covering all of that with a HUGE dose of prayer and gratitude at the opportunity.
13 years ago, I was recovering from a bit of a traumatic birth and was holding the most beautiful person I had ever seen. 13 years ago, I didn’t have a clue, but we had a bunch of useless ideas. 13 years ago, Craig and I were entirely stunned, overjoyed, and terrified that we were parents. We’re entering teenage years about the same. Stunned and overjoyed at the person we’ve helped get to this age. We’re a bit nervous at what lies ahead… but it’s exciting too. He’s come so far! He’s one of my favorite people to talk to about his interests.
My heart almost cannot handle the joy I have over this incredible teenager & his not so little brother who also will be 9 this month. Two December birthdays and one is a teenager. Onward to this fresh adventure!
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