Fly Boys! (PQW 1/19/11)

I like stuff that flies. I prefer to watch it from the ground though. Nothing wrong with flying, I guess. I will fly if I have to and have many times. But I have a real case of “feet on the ground” syndrome most of the time. When I do fly, I like really big passenger jets. Super big. I would not want to fly in something small.

I do love an air show though. If you have never been to one, I really think you should check it out. Bring ear protection, and head up to NAS Oceana sometime for some loud fun with the Blue Angels. It will blow your mind!

Our family is pretty big into aviation. My husband, Craig, was a flight mechanic on the HH-60 helicopter in the Coast Guard until he was seriously injured in 2005. He still works on helicopters, but as a civilian and from a desk now. Craig really misses his flying days and search and rescue missions. Both of us have grandfathers who worked some in aviation, too. My grandfather Williams was a mechanic on the CG Albatross long ago and Craig’s Grandpa Norm was a WWII test pilot and has wild stories. Our son is absolutely bonkers over anything with wheels & engines, but especially wings or rotor heads! Possibly another generation of aviation zooming through our living room. 

I enjoy living places where I can see the occasional something fly by. When we were stationed in Cape Cod, Massachusetts, we lived on an Air National Guard Base that had  a Coast Guard Air Station and Air Force F-15’s. Craig and I would sometimes plop lawn chairs in the front yard and watch the F-15’s roar overhead, ducking and running from each other in mock dog fights. Super cool stuff! We were awakened several nights to the roar of a C-17 turning up on the runway. Of course, we had the Coast Guard helicopters and Falcons to watch as well. It was like living at an air show. It took me a while to get used to all the noise, but I sometimes miss the sound of afterburners now. 

I have to say we really have it great where we are now. Surrounded by fields in Perquimans County, we probably get the coolest type of flying there is: Crop Dusters! It’s really amazing to me how they manage to stay in the air. Watching them dust the fields around our house, I’ve occasionally wondered if I should put Farm Bureau on speed dial. Absolutely daring dives and pulling up at the apparent last minute over the trees...better than stuff I have paid to see. It’s thrilling! My son just loves those bright yellow aircraft. They are impressive pilots. If you can’t make it to NAS Oceana, stop and watch a crop duster. Worth the price of admission!

Need a "Do-Over"? (PQW 1/12/11)

Happy New Year! How many of you made New Year’s resolutions? How many have you messed up already? How many of you are too jaded to even bother? I can identify. Sometimes the New Year fills me with hope of change. Sometimes it overwhelms me with expectation. We all have stuff we’d like to fix about ourselves because none of us are perfect. I’m so thankful that God loves us anyway. I am deeply grateful for mercy. 

I had to go to court today for a speeding ticket. I think court is a fascinating place for people watching...and no it wasn’t my first visit. It’s interesting to watch people walk in. Everyone has a guilty look on their face, especially in traffic court. I always try to appear casual, nonchalantly reading my book, like I wandered into court purely for the ambience. I fool no one, I’m sure. 

Once again I was caught for being in a hurry with no real good reason. I hoped to talk to the Assistant DA to have the ticket reduced, so I wouldn’t have to pay for my transgressions for years to come. As it came closer to my time at the front, I realized how much I needed mercy. I needed the ADA to look upon me with favor that I definitely didn’t deserve. I didn’t have anyone to take my place...it was just me and the ADA. 

He asked me what I did wrong and I confessed to speeding. Sure I had all kinds of fabulous excuses but they didn’t really matter, so I didn’t bother. I was guilty. I knew it, he knew it and anyone who has known me for any length of time at all would know it. He did some scribbling that I couldn’t see while I held my breath. He reduced it! I said thank you and refrained from hugging him. I paid my ticket and walked out a free woman! 

I’ll do my very best to be good from now on. Cruise control is my friend. I wish I had it for all of the other aspects of my life, since being perpetually hurried is not my only flaw. I’m sure I’ll mess up in some respect again (maybe even before I finish writing this column), but I know that God’s amazing grace forgives me and lets me be a free woman again. You don’t need a ball to drop in New York City to get a fresh start on life. 

I wish for you all a Happy New Year full of blessings, mercy and ample opportunity for “do-overs” because we all need them. 

Also, don’t forget to set your cruise control. 

Snow Woman (PQW 12/29/10

(Note from the author. I wrote this the week before Christmas. We've since had a blizzard that garnered us 11 inches of snow. Please don't throw things at my house.)

If it is cold, I am a firm believer that it should snow. I am not much of a fan of cold weather, but I think snow is lovely. Snow has a romance to it that not many other weather phenomenon can claim. Snow makes you want to stop what you are doing and watch it in silence for a little while. I know some of you are probably big anti-snow people, but I bet even the most hardened snow dislikers amongst you would admit to a slight pause to watch the peaceful flakes swirl down from the sky.

I wasn’t much of a snow fan when I was younger. Everything closed and Mom wouldn’t take us anywhere because of the icy roads. It was always wet, slushy mess that soaked my gloves in a few seconds and made snowball fights akin to being hit with a baseball. 

But then we moved to New England! We had heard that Cape Cod doesn’t get much snow. I thought that was the same as saying Hertford doesn’t get much snow. I soon found out that we measure snow differently. Not much to New England would make us roll our streets up. Once at Sears I inquired about a odd-looking mulching machine they had on display. The nice Sears employee shook his head at my Carolina accent and informed me it was a snow thrower. Well, I had certainly never seen the likes of that before! I was pretty sure we didn’t need anything as complicated as that, so I talked Craig into a cute snow shovel. When we got home I put it in the shed about 50 feet from our house. 

A big winter storm arrived and I excitedly called my parents that evening to tell them we had 6 inches of snow! We had white-out conditions! How fun! But I woke up the next morning to 46 inches of snow. That was beyond words, even for yours truly. I didn’t call my parents for a good hour because I was seriously stunned. It was still snowing. We couldn’t even open our door! Then the faithful moment came when Craig asked “where is the shovel?” and I had to sheepishly tell him it was in the shed. Way over there in the shed, which was completely encased with snow. I’m just thankful our marriage survived that moment. Speaks volumes for the character of my husband. Turns out, snow shovels go in the basement.

We have had some snow here in Hertford this winter, and while we don’t need our shovel, we still have it. I like to bring it in the house at Christmas and stick a bow on it. It’s a bright red shovel and makes for cute winter decoration, but mostly, I just like having it close. I hope I never have to shovel this driveway with it! I might look into one of those contraptions at Sears. 

Calling all 'Super Moms'! (PQW 12/1/10)

Are you a super mom? You know the kind. The ones with the absolutely spotless houses that they could actually perform surgery in...and then do. The ones with the children who look freshly ironed and scrubbed. Those mothers who cook perfectly balanced meals at absolutely every dining opportunity. Grow their own organic vegetables and have their own grass fed cows. Those who make the cookies from scratch, jelly from scratch, itch relief from scratch. Those women who work all day and then stay home all day; who never leave their children and who go on trips alone with their husbands. Those women who look beautiful all the time, in the most stylish clothes, yet never spend money on themselves. The women who dote on their families, yet volunteer at every single thing going on at church and school without feeling overwhelmed. Starting to sound a bit impossible, right? It is. But I’m only starting to realize that fact.

I’m the kind of mom who naturally lives at the other end of the pendulum swing. The one who has dog hair balls blowing across the floor at least every other day. I probably track in as much mud as my son, because there is a good chance we were splashing in the same puddle. I have no use for an iron because I own a dryer. I wasted time I’ll never get back trying to farm organic tomatoes. We’ll just say farming is not my giftedness. Neither is cooking. I find it ironic that now that I’m starting to need makeup to look awake, I don’t often have time to apply it. 

I struggle with trying to balance motherhood with wifehood and all of the other things that come along that demand my time. For almost 3 years now, I have made a valiant attempt to accomplish everything I thought I needed to do. This summer I even added training for a 5K to my list. That was a fateful decision that taught me a lot. First, I learned that I actually can run. Secondly, I learned that I am just too tired to do it. It was the straw that broke the back of the proverbial camel. I actually passed out at the grocery store due to exhaustion! Even my eye doctor told me I was too tired.

I have since taken off my “Super Mom” cape. I feel a lot better! I have dropped a few extracurricular activities and eased back into a much more enjoyable pace of life. I am discovering that I’m a better mom now than I was when I was “Super”! I learned about pacing myself while running and it has great life application off the track. It is much easier to learn to balance a few things than whole lot of things! Motherhood is a feat of endurance. Every family is different and has their own pace. Be sure to find yours before you are feet up in the pet food aisle!

thankfulness

When Craig & I first moved to Massachusetts in 2004, we spent our first Thanksgiving there with just each other & the dog.  He fixed cornish game hens and asparagus...can't remember what else we had. It was wonderful! It's in my book as one of my most favorite Thanksgivings. Sitting at a card table 678 miles from home...with snow falling! Later, we made homemade pumpkin pies (with homemade whipped cream) and took them to the guys on duty at the air station. We sat out there trading stories for a few hours. Definitely not the typical Thanksgiving, but it touched my heart in a deep way. I had missed being at home for Thanksgiving a few times in the past for various reasons, but not like that. I was completely removed from my comfort zone and suffering from a tough dose of homesickness. We decided to make our Thanksgiving our very own. It was a special day and I was so thankful for so many things. It made me thankful for my husband. It turned our base house into a home. Especially thankful to God from whom all blessings flow. It still hits me. I looked around the table today; back home where I am thankful to be. I looked at the children, adults. all that food! So many blessings in one place.
Wherever you are today, I hope you have been able to find time in your day for a bit of quiet reflection. Even if it's just before your eyes close from turkey overload!

Every good and perfect gift comes from God (James 1:17)

Happy Thanksgiving! (PQW 11/24/10)

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! In our family on Thanksgiving Day, we all sit down, starving, staring at all that delicious food and go around the table mentioning at least one thing of which we are thankful. We each take our turn, with our mouths watering, to come up with something different than everyone else. God’s grace, family and recent blessings are all mentioned. Last year, my son of almost 2, was the last one to have a turn. We asked “What are you thankful for?” and he grinned and said “Rolls!!” So we gave him one! 

This time of year always brings a time of reflection of all the things we have and where we are in life. For the most part, this country is quite blessed. Though the economic times have made us all scale back a bit, we still live in a land of excess. Most of us can probably never remember a time when we didn’t have enough to eat. Most of us wish we didn’t eat quite so much! 

We may not have seen it, but many people in this area don’t have the means to fill their plates, or the plates of their children. Many of these people are hard working individuals that just can’t make their ends meet. My son is a growing boy and is always hungry. I couldn’t imagine how awful it would be if I couldn’t meet that most basic of needs.

As you look around and count your blessings this time of year, this is your friendly reminder to please remember the local charities. They work almost entirely on donations. So help out that chilly Santa Claus with the bell by Woodard’s this year. Contribute to the food box at your local church. So many ways to spread good cheer to other people in our community this year. 

I’ll do you one better. I’ll challenge you to help others throughout next year! Many of these charities suffer in the early months of the year because donations die off. Usually, if you are like me, you jump into the new year with “me-focused goals” like losing those holiday pounds or organizing that junk closet, finally. Let’s decide right now together to do all of those things as well as try to keep our eyes and ears open for the needs of others.  We all get by with a little help from our friends!

Hoo Hoo to you!

My little guy's third birthday is next month. I cannot even believe how the time has flown! I remember when the days were much slower. Some how or another, at the moment of childbirth, time moves into hyperdrive! There is just no way that those impossibly long nights with a colicky newborn are long gone. I didn't think they'd ever end! I'm so glad that's over! But I certainly don't feel that way about everything.

To distract me from my melancholy for my baby of no more, he is turning into a charming little boy. Really, if given the choice to go back to those sweet baby days or stay where I am, I would be terribly torn. I like this guy! Not to say he is perfect...no one is. But he's pretty cool, for sure.

I love how he messes up the language. I correct most things, of course. But sometimes it's really cute! He says "Happy Birthday Hoo Hoo!" Instead of "to you". It's just how he heard it and that's the way it is to him, no matter what we say. Recently, he has been talking a lot about his upcoming birthday. He now refers to it as his "Hoo Hoo" like some kind of toddler slang for reasons unbeknownst to us. "Momma, is it my Hoo Hoo yet?" "No dear. Next month." He has lots of plans for his birthday as well. He recently discussed those at Tommy's Pizza over lunch in the megaphone loud indoor voice he uses in public. "I think I want pizza and ice cream cones on my happy Hoo Hoo." Oh no! I started laughing despite myself. Pretty sure any eavesdropper would have no idea he was talking about his birthday! I decided then and there that the Hoo Hoo days were numbered. We've got to work on that one!